10 days before his death …!
Advice : “Ivvadam alavaatu chesko nana, chaala baaguntundi”
(Start giving my son, that’s really a good feeling.)
A multi-specialty hospital food court !!
He was being treated for throat cancer(He was a teetotaler). Doctors and we were very happy that his reaction and recovery to the Chemo was very positive.
That was my 2nd day with him in the hospital and his 3rd week. My brother(elder) was with him for first two weeks. We brothers decided to be with him for that 45 days Chemo swapping every two weeks as my father didn’t want my mother to be with him in that hospital as she cannot withstand it.
My father was a very reserved person and speaks very less.
After the regular doctor visits that morning he asked me to take him out from that room and hospital environment for a change. But we were strictly told by the hospital staff and care takers not to do that as it leads to some infections.
Since my father’s condition was not bad and his body withstanding levels to the Chemo was good doctor gave a permission for an hour to take him out.
Though it was a permission for outing, I took him to the hospital food court inside the campus and our conversation started.
It was the first time that my father was very much open to me and started discussing every single thing that he remember about me. It started from my college gold medal day and continued till the incident of my first small accident when I was 1.5 yrs old. I’m completely seeing a different person in him, our smiles turned into laughter.
I would say that 45 minutes of talk with him was the best part of my life.
Then he had put me this question ..
Dad: “Do you know why a few old people (neighbours) visit our home whenever you come for any festival or any other times ???”
(Actually my father and mother lives in our village me and my brother lives in different cities due to our work life.
The old people he mentioned were poor people in our village neighborhood.)
Me: with a question mark(?) face “as I grow up as one of them and settled somewhere now, they just wanted to how I’m doing and how’s my life”
Dad: “That’s fine!! but do you remember especially(he quoted 3, 4 names of old people) XYZ, ABC, GHJ.. visits every time you come home??
Me: Blank Face
Dad: “Ok listen! They are very poor and they couldn’t work anymore. Do you really know they hardly get food to eat. Even their kids/sons situation also same and they work hard to get the basic needs for their wife and kids. These old people were always a 3rd priority for them, there is nothing wrong in that as their economical situations are so bad. But these old people do have medical needs and other small small wishes like us. Since you are well settled they visit you with an expectation that you may give them some money.”
Me was in complete shock and could relate their face expressions when they visited me to my father’s words.
Dad (Continued) : “ Do you know that your mother gives them some money and tell them that those were given by you?”
Remember Suresh, life gives chances to a few people to give back. You may give lots of treats to your colleagues and spend lots of money on other entertainment. But start giving these kind of people as well. Do you know what they tell when your mother gives money on behalf of you
“Maaku telsamma Chinnayya Bangaram, maa baabu challagaa undaali”
(We know ma our kid is gold, he should be happy always)
That 200, 300 rupees you give them may not be a big deal for you but that fulfills their small small wishes like buying something for their grand kids or getting some new cloths, etc. Then he said this advice..
“Ivvadam alavaatu chesko nana, chaala baaguntundi”
(Start giving my son, that’s really a very good feeling.)
After 10 days due to some serious lung infections he left us. But those words and the time he spent with me always stays with me.
I want to tell him this now …
“Ivvadam nijamgaa chaala bagundi Nanna :)”
(Giving is very satisfactory dad)..
Thank you Nanna ..