Love marriage is like making your own noodles and arranged marriage is like buying noodles.
Long answer, read on.
1. You're so wrong about Indian arranged marriage.
Open times of India or any newspaper on Sunday and read the matrimony page. You'll find women and men having criteria for getting laid.
e.g. Here's one ad that i can read right now.
Jain bride, 25, earns 6Lakh, wants to work after marriage, looking for partner, earning 20L,NRI, under 30, alcohol allowed, no smoking, non veg not allowed.
Conclusion: Arranged marriages are deals in marketplace. Bitter truth. Man buys woman with his package and it's her beauty and skills get sold.
So when you set so many such criteria, do you really think you are marrying a stranger, when that person you find as per this criteria. Because logically you have figured out everything that goes in the person, other than private parts and only that part is likely to explore after marriage and of course, mental response of the partner as relationship progress ahead.
Still think, arranged marriage is about sleeping with stranger?
2. Love marriage is over-fantasized all over the world.
Not all people are disciplined enough to choose what is good for themselves. e.g. Many women in india, prepare themselves and their habits so they end up being married arranged marriage way in safe family – for financial and social security reasons. Trust me, I am friend of two women who decided to get engineering education to marry NRI and they did just that.
Love marriages are not always safe when the man or woman can't stand for their own decisions and are not strong at decision making skills.
On that comparison, love marriage is progressive, often full of hardship, you know about earning-package of your partner while you are in love and see the progress, you know about likes and dislikes of partner within the relationship, you have to test every single aspect of the partner while you are in relationship.
More educated and mature you're, the more success in love marriage. In case of arranged marriage, the pressure from peers is too much that you have to find reasons to break out of marriage. In case of love marriage it is easy yet takes bigger mental toll on either partner.
Few things to get out of the way –
- Not all love marriages are meant for sex. Hell, if that were to be the case, many couples that I know are supposed to take off from their relationship by now. If any dumb person wants to have love marriage for the sake of "sex" and "not being with stranger", they are on their way to emotional suicide.
- Arranged marriage doesn't mean you end up having sex with stranger. One-night stands fit that description much better.
In some castes and regions, it takes 3 weeks to even touch your wife after all the ritual drama. In that time, you end up knowing your wife way better than your cat. You get comfortable even before marriage by texting/phone and meeting outside or even having dinner with partners family.
So the stuff that you see about arranged marriage in TV and movies, is limited to uneducated crowd or the educated people who choose to follow that much backward marriage formula.
Marriage in india, is not just meant for sleeping with man/woman and having kids and taking pictures with DSLR and singing happy ending song. It connects two families, and for that matter, gives the man and woman safe sex pass.
By the way, how safe is sleeping with every woman/man you like on life journey? I choose not to take risk due to STD in this highly populated nation where nobody is worth trusting on emotional scale.